#619: Is there a procedure for the One who`s taking a Second Wife?
QUESTION
” Asalamu alaikum waramotulai wabarakatu pls Is there a procedure to follow in Islam before taken a second wife l, pls if there is mention them”
ANSWER
Wa alaykum Salām Warahmatullāh Wabarakātuh.
Alhamdulillāh
Firstly, it should be known that, as we have preceded in one of the questions that we answered on this platform, the sounder position with the ‘Ulamā is that because Polygamy is an added responsibility, there is no added merit of Polygamy over Monogamy unless if in Polygamy, it is accompanied by reasons and benefits such as aiming to have more children trained upon the Sunnah, increasing the morality in the society by reducing the number of unmarried sisters out there and its likes.
But, to simply increase in the number of women married for the mere fun of it or for the mere polygamous nature of man is not a Sunnah in itself that is rewarded (__Mandūb__), rather, a permissibility that is allowed (__Mubāh__) in the Sharī’a.
We had mentioned that this was the Verdict of the Shāfi’ī Madh’hab and the Hanbali schools as was referred in Mughnī Al-Muhtāj
Second, it should be known by Muslim Sisters out there, that though difficult and painful, polygamy is allowed in Islām on a general note, encouraged on certain situations, and obligatory on very other peculiar situations.
They need to exercise a lot of patience when it comes to it and understand that that which is made permissible by Allāh must not be rejected by them for in that is a rejection of the Hukm of Allāh.
The Pious of women are those that focus on their responsibilities toward their Husbands, their children and their kin, and are patient with whatever life throws at them.
Third, the Precept known in the Sharī’a among the Qawā’id of Fiqh is that ‘Whosoever his permission is not a condition for the legality of an Act, then his Knowledge is not a condition for its authenticity’
This means that a man does not need the permission of his wife, nor her knowledge for his second ‘Aqd of Nikāh to be sound.
Rather, what is agreed upon by the Ulamā is that it is mandatory upon him to be gentle to her and to treat her with kindness and mercy.
Whether on the matter of adding a wife or in general day to day affairs.
That is because in so doing is achieving one of the major purposes of Marriage which is Mercy, love and Kindness.
Fourth, a woman may take as a condition from her husband before marriage a promise not to add a wife after her.
If he does make that promise, then to keep to it becomes binding upon him.
This is the sounder of the two positions held by the Ulamā on this matter.
This position was favoured by Imām Ahmad and strengthened immensely by Ibn Taymiyyah and Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyyah – Rahimahumullāh.
It is premised on the Hadīth that was recorded by both Al-Bukhāri and Muslim in which the Rasūl – salallāhu alayhi wasallam – said:
إن أحق الشروط أن توفوا ما استحللتم به الفروج
“Indeed the most deserving of conditions that must be fulfilled is that with which the private organs were made permissible.”
Fifth, it should be known that though Polygamy is permissible, it is not free of been a nest through which Iblīs attacks a man and/or his family.
That said, a man must realise that though Allāh allows him polygamy, he hasn’t allowed him Zinā and any of its preludes.
He must realise that though Allāh allowed him Polygamy, he hasn’t allowed him to rip his family apart or to trample on his wife’s rights or to destroy his home.
That means that a man must be wise and have the temerity to weigh the advantages and the disadvantages accordingly before stepping into it.
We ask Allah for guidance and wisdom.
After taking all of those into consideration, know, o honoured one, that there is no *definite* steps to take when seeking to add a wife in Islām other than the same steps that are taken when taking a wife, and the conditions of Nikāh that are known to all.
We ask Allāh to grant our Ummah safe and healthy families, and to grant our sisters the forbearance to bear the pains and difficulties that come with polygamy.
We ask Allāh to grant wisdom to our brothers, and the patience and focus to maintain their families and avoid matters that lead to fractures, āmīn.
Bārakallāhu Fīkum
Jazākumullāhu Khayran.
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