#1181: Ruling on sharing only Nights between Wives

QUESTION:

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh.

What is the Ruling behind the Act of a man with two wives, where by he share two nights for them both and withhold the day, to be his, I.e he share only the nights within the two wives but he chooses to rest in one of the wives house even if it’s not her night and will even have intercourse with her.

ANSWER:

Wa Alaykum Salām Warahmatullāh Wabarakātuh

If what you have said is exactly as described, then this is cheating and unfair.

What the Sharī’ah made obligatory upon the man who has more than one wife is to be just and fair in treating them in housing, night rest, spending, clothing and feeding. There is no permissibility for him to be skewed in his treatment of any of them. For this reason, Imām Ash-Shāfi’ī said in Al-‘Umm:

“What the he Sunnah of the Messenger of Allāh Salallāhu Alayhi Wasallam indicates, and what the Generality of the Ulamā of the Muslims agree upon is that it is upon a man to share equal number of days and nights between his wives and not that he has a freehand to be unfair and oppressive about it”

This is a matter about which the Sharī’ah is strict.

Can’t you see that they agreed that, even if the man was ill and sick, or even impotent, he must still share the nights across?

Imām Muwaffaquddīn Ibn Quddāmah Al-Maqdisī rahimahullāh said in Al-Mughnī:
“This is because the purpose of the splitting is company and presence…”

And as recorded by ‘Ā’ishah radiyallāhu ‘anha, when the Rasūl Salallāhu Alayhi Wasallam was in his severe illness, he would still take the turns across his wives and ask them where he is expected to be the next day and whose turn it was. And when it became severe upon him, he gathered them and sought their permission to remain in the home of ‘Ā’ishah radiyallāhu ‘anha due to the illness and his inability to keep the rounds.

The Ulamā agreed that, anyone faced with this situation, must seek their permission, if they agree, fine, otherwise, he must keep the rounds or stay away and alone completely for the interest of fairness and justice.

Where then does the person about whom question is asked, sees the permissibility of keeping a day for himself and them choosing where to pass the night???

There is no blame if he chooses to keep a night for himself provided there is no rancour. But what is blameworthy is claiming to reserve a night for himself and then spending it in the home of any of the wives he so chooses, this is oppression and injustice and such a person needs to repent.

Is he not aware of the Hadith in which the Rasūl Salallāhu Alayhi Wasallam said, as was recorded by Abū Dāwud As-Sijistānī from Abū Hurayrah radiyallāhu ‘anha,

من كان له زوجتان فمال إلى إحداهن جاء يوم القيامة وشقه مائل

“When a man has two wives and he is inclined to one of them, he will come on the Day of resurrection with a side hanging down.”

We seek Allāh’s refuge from that.
And Allāh knows best.

Bārakallāhu Fīkum
Jazakumullāhu Khayran

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