_Imaam Ibn Qudaamah Al-Maqdisi -rahimahullaah-_
Said:
*ADAAB OF RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN COUPLES.*
Know verily that, as for the husband, he is highly recommended and encouraged to put the following ethics into action.
1. Preparing *Al walimah*(banquet), for it is highly beloved and encouraged by the sharia.
2. Behaving in good manners to his wives, and bearing their shortcomings.
In this regard, it is reported from Abu Hurairah radiyallaahu anhu who said_ The Messenger of Allah sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said:
_”استوصوا بالنساء خيرا، فإنهن خلقن من ضلع، وإن أعوج ما في الضلع أعلاه، فإن ذهبت تقيمه كسرته، وإن تركته لم يزل أعوج فاستوصوا بالنساء خيرا”_
_”Treat women kindly, for verily, they have been created like a curved rib. The most curved of a rib is its head. If you intend to straight it, you will break it, and if you leave it, it remains curved. Thus, treat women kindly._”
Transmitted and recorded by Imaam Bukhaari in his ‘Sahih’#5186 and Imaam Muslim in his ‘Sahih’#1468.
3. He should joke and play with her. For it is reported that the messenger of Allah sallallaahu alayhi wasallam raced with his wife Aisha radiyallaahu anha and used to joke with his wives.
It is also reported from Jaabir radiyallaahu anhu who said_ The Messenger of Allah sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said to him:
_”هلا بكرا تلاعبها وتلاعبك”_
_”Why don’t you marry a virgin, so that you might play with her and she will also play with you.”_
Transmitted and recorded by Imaam Bukhaari in his ‘Sahih’#5247 and Imaam Muslim in his ‘Sahih’#715.
4. The joke between the husband and his wives should be moderate so that the husband should not lose his dignity and respect before them.
5. Modesty in jealousy. It is for him to take care of those things that might cause problem between them and at the same time, he should not have bad suspicion about his wives.
6. He should moderately spend on his wives without Al israaf(extravagance).
*23th Dhul-Hijjah, 1437.*
Allaahu A’alam! Baarakallaahu feekum!
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